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04 February 2011 @ 04:30 pm
Current Music: "Next to you" - Tim Easton
29 October 2010 @ 02:07 am
I had someone not so long ago who was totally convinced that "Azeleen" was my real firstname. 

*very Magnus-ish tone of voice*
Sorry to disappoint...
*normal voice again*

Just thought I could just as much tell where I get that nick from, right? I mean, isn't that something more to share, no matter how small that is? Told you I wasn't good at talking about myself, so apologize for the baby steps...

Azeleen is a name I've found in a fantasy book I used to read a few years ago. The book is French and I doubt it was ever translated in English but if you come accross "La Sève & le Givre" by Lea Silhol, I suggest you give it a try. Azeleen is one of the various names given to the main protagonist, and in the book mythology (and own languages, I suppose), it is presumed to mean "She who is like my very own reflection". Starting from that point, I thought.. why not? Most of the time when i look at myself, I see a young person that I don't recognize, let it be in a good or a bad way. I thought the fact that "she is like my own reflection" but is not really me as I see myself, that was quite appropriate for a while. Anyway, I get what I meant by that, even though it's not that easy to transcribe the thought in a language that is originally not your own.

So here is the reason why "Azeleen" is the most given name I have on the internet these days... Aleandru is another of the book's characters. For a change. But I think it's the only one....

Current Music: Love will show you everything, by Jennifer Love Hewitt
28 October 2010 @ 02:38 am
It is funny how sometimes some things can strike close to home. I was reading some fanfic earlier. Let's say I was in the mood for tragedy and the Mentalist was airing on tv at the time (french tv channel). I had to find something, to see how people see the pairing of Jane & Lisbon. Because I am that curious... Or because tragedy feels so close to home that I actually need to read other lives get messed up. I don't know...

But there were these couples of paragraphs.. They had my breath sucked in, and my heart wrenched. Because they felt close to home. Because it was like somebody else had been in my mind and just took the feeling to put words on them and display them to the world. It felt weird. And I'm feeling all the more sad..... but I guess I deserve this, right?

It's funny, because just when you think you've been through enough – that you couldn't possibly feel any more pain, or any more alone, life throws something at you that makes whatever happened in the past seem like nothing, seem pointless. (...)

And then, a year ago today, suddenly all of that was nothing. Nothing compared to the pain then, and even now. Missing someone can happen on so many levels. Some days it's worse than others. Some days it's just a twinge, some days you don't even realize why the twinge is there, but it always is. Some days you're just sad, all the time, and you can't begin to explain it to yourself, let alone others. And some days it's unbearable, it a searing pain in your heart that never eases. Depending on how much you love the person, the number of days of each and the levels you experience vary.

The anger levels vary too, as much as the sadness does. The unfairness of it all. The fact that someone is no longer here, with you - you get angry at life, at them, at yourself. The fact that you'll never change what's been and gone. In the end, it doesn't matter what could have happened, what you could have done, because it didn't happen. Or you didn't do it. And you hate yourself for that. And then, suddenly, hate is all you can feel, because hating everything, everyone, is so much easier than feeling the rest.www.fanfiction.net/s/6420463/1/Fading_Away

It's funny how things go... How you may laugh, try and be happy. Try and look happy. And then from times to times, some texts like those remind you of why you handle the difficult times not as easy as you did before. Because sometimes, all it took is the one person to make things like so much better no matter what.

He's not there anymore. And the void he left, now friends fill. Slowly. We're not quite where I was with him, but it's a relief to think that "alone" is not exactly true, even if in some views solitude is all I will ever really get. Hurt is a hard thing to get over with, but I'm grateful for those who are there willing to help me move on... even when they don't even realize it.

Current Music: Take my heart back, by Jennifer Love Hewitt
26 October 2010 @ 03:01 pm

I was wondering if you could actually help me a little bit with something. I promise, it won't hurt a bit =p . I just take the opportunity that so many people come from different countries to ask a little something ^^

See, I have this friend. She's from Belarus and doesn't have quite much money. Don't worry, I won't ask for any xD . But she does get some help from time to time from a friend of hers that makes her life a tiny bit easier. That friend collects stamps and she tries to get some to help him. That's where you come in.

If you're coming to Chevron in November, could you please bring a stamp (or two-three, as you wish) from where you are? You don't need to get a brand new, but for example cut the stamp out of random mail you receive and keep it in your bag until we meet (I am G92)? That would be just plain cool, wouldn't cost you a thing and will make my friend quite happy about it and might even help her at a small scale. 

In advance, thanks and see you in two weeks <3

I think that everyone, friends/non-friends alike, are able to comment. If you agree to bring a stamp (or a couple, as  you wish :p) from your country, please comment & let me know. Thank you very much.
Current Music: "Bread & Butter", by Hugo
10 May 2010 @ 12:17 pm
Here we go, temporary driving license. Meaning I have done my 20 hours worth of exercices with a teacher and I am now fit to drive by myself. The examen can be done from 3 months from now. Just enough time for me to get used to driving and be comfortable with rules etc...

I have bought a car, second hand but still. Still got some insurances forms I need to arrange and then I'm free to hit the streets.... But yeah. Paperwork, now.... So pitiful, right?? 

Car is a Nissan Sunny. Nothing much, for all I'll ever go out xDDDD . We'll see...
28 November 2009 @ 01:34 am
This is taken from the Wikipedia page of a Manga I like (Alice 19th). This describes the main character and while reading it, it kinda felt close to home LOL. Translation by me, so if mistakes there is, please forgive me.

(...) is very average in everything she endeavours. She has a lot of trouble confiding with her friends. Being scared of getting hurt, she is very closed to others and talks few. She often forgets about herself and is very much concerned about other people's well being.

Yeah, right, so me. Only difference, she's a heroine, and I'm not. XD

Well, people, that was the thought of the moment. I said I'd try and write more often, didn't I? XD

Current Music: My side of the story; Hodges
23 November 2009 @ 11:32 pm
Hi all ! *waves*

First off, I believe it is wise to introduce myself. So first thing to know, I am a huge Amandaholic. I mean, seriously, no one has to speak evil of Amanda Tapping in front of me, or I'll (gently?) bite LOL. That feeling is even strengthen more since I actually met her last week at AT4.

I am a young woman (yeah! 21 is not that old) and I live in Belgium, for now. Let's just say that I will be studying for a month in Oxford soon and then, once my English is a tiny bit better, I plan on moving out. Probably Canada, if my contacts prove themselves worthy LOL

I studied tourism & administrative stuff. And I'm sometimes told to have a kinda great knowledge about a lot of things. What can I say? I'm a very curious person: I love to read, from dictionnaries to fantasy novels. And pretty much anything I hear on tv is researched and verified (or not). I like to know if whatever is said on shows like CSIs or Stargate or anything that technical/scientific babble. I'm pretty amateur on a lot of topic LOL with all the books I've read.

Anyway, I'll stop for now. I don't like to talk about me (which is why some entries of this journal will be set on friends only, cuz I'll try to talk a bit more about me and I don't want the whole world to know about it either LOL.

Anyway, I think I'm a nice girl, crazy at some point but all in one pretty much innofensive LOL. But please, make your own opinion of me ;)
Current Music: Kobol's Last Gleaming - Bear McCreary